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1. Director - ESTJ

Perception - to be or not to be™:

Perception A - to be™:

The Director believes that perseverance, practicality and knowledge are the keys to success in life. They want to make a difference to their communities in tangible, organized ways. Taking leadership or making tough decisions does not scare them away; they are not afraid to take the helm, roll up their sleeves and stand firm against obstacles. They want to be seen as hard-working, responsible, knowledgeable and grounded. George W. Bush quotes: "To those of you who received honors, awards and distinctions, I say well done. And to the C students, I say you, too, can be President of the United States."

Perception B - not to be™ - Ten No Go phrases that are guaranteed to upset your Director. Oxor™ has used them all:

⁐ 1. “Stop Planning! Let’s Just Wing It.”
⁐ 2. “There is no right or wrong.”
⁐ 3. “Forget the facts, follow your heart.”
⁐ 4. “I do not want advice, just validation.”
⁐ 5. “It is okay if we are late.”
⁐ 6. “Stop debating, you are being so mean.”
⁐ 7. “Come on. Let’s talk about our feelings.”
⁐ 8. “I do not have the facts. I just know. Trust me!”
⁐ 9. “You do not know what you are doing.”
⁐ 10. “Excuses, excuses, excuses.”

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2. Developer - ENTJ

Perception - to be or not to be™:

Perception A - to be™:

The Developer organizes their life strategically in the most effective way to achieve their goals. This pattern is a are big-picture thinker who goes for their dreams and focusses on long-term rather than short-term gains. They want to be seen as dauntless, intellectual, successful and enterprising. Rather than be weighed down by other people’s emotions and wavering feelings, they want to be impossible to manipulate or fool, completely undistracted from their goals. Napoleon Bonaparte quotes: "Ambition is never in a greater hurry than I. It merely keeps pace with my way of thinking". Margaret Thatcher quotes: "You persevere until you see it through...I never did any u-turns"

Perception B - not to be™ - Ten No Go phrases that are guaranteed to upset your Developer. Oxor™ has used them all:

⁐ 1. “Just share your feelings with me.”
⁐ 2. “You cannot do that.”
⁐ 3. “Let’s finish this later...”
⁐ 4. “You need to lighten up.”
⁐ 5. “I just need to vent! Just listen and stop trying to find a solution.”
⁐ 6. “Do not tell me what you think. Tell me what you feel.”
⁐ 7. “You need to smile more.”
⁐ 8. “Let’s change the subject.”
⁐ 9. “So I went here...and it was like this...and then this happened...and wow, that happened too! And...and...”
⁐ 10. “Life is so unfair.”

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3. Results - ESTP

Perception - to be or not to be™:

Perception A - to be™:

The Results longs to be completely physically and mentally immersed in their environment; to be challenged by it, but not overcome by it. Testing themselves to triumph against the elements is something they tend to enjoy; whether that means surviving in the wilderness, thinking quickly in a crisis, or rescuing someone from a bully. This pattern wants to be seen as courageous, clever, perceptive and resourceful. They want to be fully interactive with the world and all life has to offer. Nothing could be worse than to be a sedentary observer of life rather than an active participant in it. Theodore Roosevelt quotes: "We must face life with a high and resolute courage...Let us rather run the risk of wearing out rather than rusting out".

Perception B - not to be™ - Ten No Go phrases that are guaranteed to upset your Results. Oxor™ has used them all:

⁐ 1. “You cannot do that.”
⁐ 2. “What’s your 10-year plan?”
⁐ 3. “They are toxic or you are toxic.”
⁐ 4. “I know I have been MIA on social media, I had to take a break.”
⁐ 5. “If you cannot handle me at my worst, you do not deserve me at my best.”
⁐ 6. “You need to take life more seriously.”
⁐ 7. “I trust my heart above all else.”
⁐ 8. “I have come up with a schedule for your ____.”
⁐ 9. “I could care less.”
⁐ 10. “Whatever.”

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4. Inspirational - ENTP

Perception - to be or not to be™:

Perception A - to be™:

The Inspirational is an intellectual explorer who wants to experiment with technology or revolutionize the way we understand the world around us. They want to be seen as innovative, logical and dauntless; unfettered by sensitivities or biases. Their curiosity drives them and they hope they can make new discoveries that have never been revealed before. Steve Wozniak quotes: "If you read the same things as others and say the same things they say, then you’re perceived as intelligent. I’m a bit more independent and radical and consider intelligence the ability to think about matters on your own and ask a lot of skeptical questions to get at the real truth, not just what you’re told it is".

Perception B - not to be™ - Ten No Go phrases that are guaranteed to upset your Inspirational. Oxor™ has used them all:

⁐ 1. “That is just the way it is.”
⁐ 2. “Fine. Whatever.”
⁐ 3. “Because I said so.”
⁐ 4. “Everyone knows.”
⁐ 5. “Let’s use the reliable, tried-and-true method. Experimenting is a waste of time.”
⁐ 6. “This is black and white, stop over-analyzing it.”
⁐ 7. “Stop thinking with your head. Tell me what your heart says.”
⁐ 8. “You need more routine and structure in your life.”
⁐ 9. “Hurry up and decide.”
⁐ 10. “Have you heard about (random acquaintance/celebrity/distant family member)? Let me fill you in on the details.”

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5. Persuader - ENFJ

Perception - to be or not to be™:

Perception A - to be™:

The Persuader leads their life with a powerful vision of the future they want to achieve. They have insights into people and situations that stretch far beyond the present moment into the years and decades to come. This pattern wants to be seen as empathetic, visionary, friendly and inspiring. They want to motivate people to live their best lives and do something revolutionary with the time they have left. To be seen as an inspiring teacher or mentor would fill them with tremendous joy. Maya Angelou quotes: "I’m convinced of this: Good done anywhere is good done everywhere. For a change, start by speaking to people rather than walking by them like they’re stones that don’t matter. As long as you’re breathing, it’s never too late to do some good".

Perception B - not to be™ - Ten No Go phrases that are guaranteed to upset your Persuader. Oxor™ has used them all:

⁐ 1. “Stop being so dramatic.”
⁐ 2. “You are too intense.”
⁐ 3. “I am disappointed in you.
⁐ 4. “Yeah, yeah, yeah, can you hurry it up?”
⁐ 5. “Get over it.”
⁐ 6. “You are so selfish.”
⁐ 7. “Sorry. I did not show up.”
⁐ 8. “You are so fake.”
⁐ 9. “It is not that big of a deal.”
⁐ 10. “I will get around to it eventually.”

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6. Appraiser - ESFJ

Perception - to be or not to be™:

Perception A - to be™:

The Appraiser believes that it is the dozens of little things that happen in a day that add meaning and depth to life. Friendly and detail-oriented, they take a magnifying glass to the needs, emotions, likes and dislikes of other people. Without others’ realizing it, they make life easier for the people they care about in hundreds of subtle ways. The healthy Appraiser also prioritizes their own values, desires and goals as well. They want to be seen as generous, responsible, attentive and considerate. Gal Gadot quotes: "Kindness and warmth and acceptance and love. If each and every one of us will have more of that, we will have a better society".

Perception B - not to be™ - Ten No Go phrases that are guaranteed to upset your Appraiser. Oxor™ has used them all:

⁐ 1. “You are not doing enough.”
⁐ 2. “You try too hard.”
⁐ 3. “Your feelings do not matter.”
⁐ 4. “Do not take it so personally.”
⁐ 5. “Oops, I forgot about our plans.”
⁐ 6. “Rules are made to be broken.”
⁐ 7. “You are too bubbly/fake.”
⁐ 8. “I was just messing with you.”
⁐ 9. “I do not care.”
⁐ 10. “Let’s put this off until later.”

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7. Promoter - ENFP

Perception - to be or not to be™:

Perception A - to be™:

The Promoter is a visionary dreamer who wants to transform the world and help it to evolve past its limitations. They want to be seen as open-minded, ambitious and inspiring. Seeing the world for what it could be, they dream of being revolutionaries and healers, mending prejudices and helping people believe in the power of the imagination. Walt Disney quotes: "All our dreams can come true, if we have the courage to pursue them".

Perception B - not to be™ - Ten No Go phrases that are guaranteed to upset your Promoter. Oxor™ has used them all:

⁐ 1. “Because that is how it has always been done.”
⁐ 2. “Be more realistic.”
⁐ 3. “Because I said so.”
⁐ 4. “You cannot do that.”
⁐ 5. “You have no idea.”
⁐ 6. “You are such a flirt.”
⁐ 7. “Here’s your project. The deadline is tomorrow.”
⁐ 8. “Stop brainstorming and just decide.”
⁐ 9. “You are perfectly normal.”
⁐ 10. “If you really cared about me, you would...”

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8. Counselor - ESFP

Perception - to be or not to be™:

Perception A - to be™:

The Counselor has a restless need to experience life to its fullest in a physical way. Bravely testing their limits and adventuring into the far reaches of the world around them gives them joy. They want to be seen as indomitable, inspiring, friendly and down-to-earth. Rather than settle into a comfortable, routine existence, they want to test their limits and dive into the ever-changing world of nature and all it has to offer them; whether it be scaling mountains, dancing on the beach or gazing at a brilliant orange-hued sunset. Paulo Coelho quotes: "When you find your path, you must not be afraid. You need to have sufficient courage to make mistakes. Disappointment, defeat and despair are the tools God uses to show us the way".

Perception B - not to be™ - Ten No Go phrases that are guaranteed to upset your Counselor. Oxor™ has used them all:

⁐ 1. “Here is what you need to do.”
⁐ 2. “You cannot do that.”
⁐ 3. “Let’s talk about your long-term goals.”
⁐ 4. “Hurry up and .”
⁐ 5. “You are not that funny.”
⁐ 6. “Do not take this personally, but...”
⁐ 7. “I do not like you.”
⁐ 8. “Let me show you how it is done.”
⁐ 9. “You need to take life more seriously.”
⁐ 10. “Mope, mope, mope.”

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9. Specialist - ISFP

Perception - to be or not to be™:

Perception A - to be™:

The Specialist is a creative individual who wants to experience each day as a completely new and surprising miracle. While they may seem quiet and even stoic on the outside, their inner world is full of intense conviction and rich feelings. They channel these feelings into physical channels; whether that be through art, humanitarian efforts or musical expressions. These types want to be seen as original, passionate, open-minded and kind. Audrey Hepburn quotes: "I believe, every day, you should have at least one exquisite moment. People, even more than things, have to be restored, renewed, revived, reclaimed, and redeemed; never throw out anyone".

Perception B - not to be™ - Ten No Go phrases that are guaranteed to upset your Specialist. Oxor™ has used them all:

⁐ 1. “I just cannot stand (a particular type of person who was born a certain way).”
⁐ 2. “Can you do this for me? I will make it worth your while.”
⁐ 3. “You are being too sensitive.”
⁐ 4. “I told you so.”
⁐ 5. “Just sayin'.”
⁐ 6. “Did you hear what (random person) did / said?”
⁐ 7. “They are all the same.”
⁐ 8. “I apologize that you feel that way.”
⁐ 9. “That is not my problem.”
⁐ 10. “You will change.”

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10. Investigator - INFJ

Perception - to be or not to be™:

Perception A - to be™:

The Investigator is quietly perceptive, reading into situations and events in order to find out the truth behind them. Insight and empathy are two of their greatest gifts and inform the way they live their day-to-day lives. This pattern wants to be seen as empathetic, fair, kind and intuitive. Rather than be distracted by temporary experiences or enjoyment, they want to understand the deeper meaning of things and the big picture of life itself. Baruch Spinoza quotes: "The highest activity a human being can attain is learning for understanding, because to understand is to be free".

Perception B - not to be™ - Ten No Go phrases that are guaranteed to upset your Investigator. Oxor™ has used them all:

⁐ 1. “Let me stop you right there...”
⁐ 2. “Get over it.”
⁐ 3. “That will never happen.”
⁐ 4. “I have got you figured out.”
⁐ 5. “Here is some advice.”
⁐ 6. “You are too serious. Lighten up.”
⁐ 7. “Everyone like this does that.”
⁐ 8. “You are not trying hard enough.”
⁐ 9. “I will never understand you.”
⁐ 10. “Your idea is weird. Let’s go the traditional route.”

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11. Agent - INFP

Perception - to be or not to be™:

Perception A - to be™:

The Agent is a creative idealist who wants to make the world a kinder and more accepting place. While they may seem quiet and unassuming on the outside, this pattern has a lush inner world of ideas, stories and daydreams inside them. They want to be seen as creative, imaginative and original. Deep, soulful relationships make them feel alive and helping others is often part of their calling. Antoine de Saint-Exupery quotes: "And now here is my secret, a very simple secret: it is only with the heart that one can see rightly, what is essential is invisible to the eye".

Perception B - not to be™ - Ten No Go phrases that are guaranteed to upset your Agent. Oxor™ has used them all:

⁐ 1. “You are being too emotional.”
⁐ 2. “You are too naive.”
⁐ 3. “Do not take this personally.”
⁐ 4. “Life is not fair.”
⁐ 5. “Stop trying to find a deeper meaning.”
⁐ 6. “Get your head out of the clouds.”
⁐ 7. “You would not understand.”
⁐ 8. “Because I said so.”
⁐ 9. “You are just like this other person...”
⁐ 10. “Lighten up.”

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12. Achiever - ISTP

Perception - to be or not to be™:

Perception A - to be™:

The Achiever more than anything wants to see life clearly, without biases or physical and emotional clutter. Cutting past pretense to see the truth of a situation fuels them. Experiencing the world, testing their limits and chasing freedom motivates them. They want to be seen as sharp-minded, strong, adventurous and autonomous. Bruce Lee quotes: "Absorb what is useful, discard what is useless and add what is specifically your own. I’m not in this world to live up to your expectations and you’re not in this world to live up to mine".

Perception B - not to be™ - Ten No Go phrases that are guaranteed to upset your Achiever. Oxor™ has used them all:

⁐ 1. “Why are you so serious all the time?”
⁐ 2. “My Life is so hard. Let me tell you...”
⁐ 3. “I know what you are going to say.”
⁐ 4. “You are wrong. Driving in the left-hand lane 10 kmh below the speed limit is perfectly okay.”
⁐ 5. “Hurry up and decide.”
⁐ 6. “You need to think with your heart.”
⁐ 7. “It is all their fault.”
⁐ 8. “Oh I wanted to tell you something! This happened, then this, and..oh wait! Did you hear about that?”
⁐ 9. “I need you to commit to a schedule. You have too much time on your hands.”
⁐ 10. “You cannot do it that way.”

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13. Practitioner - ISFJ

Perception - to be or not to be™:

Perception A - to be™:

The Practitioner believes in staying true to their values, aiding those who are hurting and making the world a gentler place overall. This pattern often values the hearth and home and enjoys the little things that make life tranquil and meaningful. There is a quiet power and warmth in their presence; they do not have the commanding style of the Director or Developer, but a steady, patient, practical persistence in doing what needs to be done for the good of all. This pattern wants to be seen as responsible, thoughtful, wise and steadfast. Mother Teresa quotes: "Love begins at home, and it is not how much we do, but how much love we put in the action that we do".

Perception B - not to be™ - Ten No Go phrases that are guaranteed to upset your Practitioner. Oxor™ has used them all:

⁐ 1. “I do not need your help.”
⁐ 2. “Why are you so quiet? Speak up.”
⁐ 3. “That is not good enough.”
⁐ 4. “Before you go on...”
⁐ 5. “It is not that big of a deal.”
⁐ 6. “I Might. I Might Not.”
⁐ 7. “Aww, you are so tender-hearted/timid/cute.”
⁐ 8. “You are so selfish.”
⁐ 9. “Let’s just wing it.”
⁐ 10. “Excuses, excuses, excuses.”

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14. Objective Thinker - ISTJ

Perception - to be or not to be™:

Perception A - to be™:

The Objective Thinker is one of the most dedicated, steady people you will find. Fond of routine and order, they organize their lives so that every moment of their day flows like a well-oiled machine. They want to be seen as honest, responsible, calm and intelligent. Through hard work and dedication they are often beacons of strength for the people around them. And while on the outside they typically appear serious and reserved, inside they have an inner sensitivity and conviction that guides them to make conscientious choices. Jordan Peterson quotes: No one gets away with anything, ever, so take responsibility for your own life".

Perception B - not to be™ - Ten No Go phrases that are guaranteed to upset your Objective Thinker. Oxor™ has used them all:

⁐ 1. “I cannot help it. It is just how I am.”
⁐ 2. “You should smile more.”
⁐ 3. “You just did not try hard enough.”
⁐ 4. “Are you sure?”
⁐ 5. “Calm Down!”
⁐ 6. “I am an (Personality type / Astrological sign). So that is why I do X.”
⁐ 7. “What is wrong? Talk to me!”
⁐ 8. (At the Last Minute) “Sorry I cannot make it.”
⁐ 9. “What is your opinion on X? Wait, that is not nice.”
⁐ 10. “Whatever.”

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15. Perfectionist - INTP

Perception - to be or not to be™:

Perception A - to be™:

The Perfectionist tends to internalize their thoughts and ideas, mulling over things and performing experiments and innovations autonomously. Because so much of their process is internalized, people tend to underestimate them. They want to be seen as independent, intelligent and inventive. They want people to realize that even though they may seem quiet and even quirky, they have enough insight and strategic capability to do nearly anything they set their mind to. Marie Curie quotes: "Nothing in life is to be feared, it is only to be understood".

Perception B - not to be™ - Ten No Go phrases that are guaranteed to upset your Perfectionist. Oxor™ has used them all:

⁐ 1. “That is just the way it is.”
⁐ 2. “Because I said so.”
⁐ 3. “Why aren’t you talking?”
⁐ 4. “Did you hear what (random friend) did?”
⁐ 5. “Yes or no. You do not need to explain.”
⁐ 6. “Hurry up and decide.”
⁐ 7. “Hey, I Know that you are reading. But...”
⁐ 8. “Why didn’t you notice my haircut?”
⁐ 9. “Let’s have a heart-to-heart conversation.”
⁐ 10. “Get out of your head.”

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16. Enhancer - INTJ

Perception - to be or not to be™:

Perception A - to be™:

The Enhancer has an endless thirst for knowledge and understanding. As bold visionaries, they are able to lock onto a future dream and strategically organize their lives in order to make that dream a reality. Often quiet and reserved, they have a powerful inner world of convictions, questions, theories and plans. They want to be seen as wise, original, inventive and courageous. Nikola Tesla quotes: "My method is different. I do not rush into actual work. When I get an idea I start at once building it up in my imagination. I change the construction, make improvements and operate the device entirely in my mind".

Perception B - not to be™ - Ten No Go phrases that are guaranteed to upset your Enhancer. Oxor™ has used them all:

⁐ 1. “You do not know what you are talking about.”
⁐ 2. “You think too much.”
⁐ 3. “You need to lighten up.”
⁐ 4. “You cannot do that.”
⁐ 5. “You should smile more.”
⁐ 6. “Because this is how it has always been done.”
⁐ 7. “You need to go out more.”
⁐ 8. “I just decided to pop over.”
⁐ 9. “Here, let me show you how it is done.”
⁐ 10. “That will never happen.”

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