When someone is being Ingeniously Problematic™
Abrasive and Rude™; or by being on the Hypocrisy Gauge™
it can make it easy for you to pick their pattern

I am the doyen of being Ingeniously Problematic™ - just ask Monica

Ingeniously Problematic™ behaviour is on display when it is clearly known what the desired outcome is, yet an assertion is made that may not be untruthful, is likely to be ambiguous and the author can use it to advantage. It is designed to give the recipient hope; reality may be 'bugger off' or (mis)leading you into taking up some sort of offer. It often involves blatant hypocrisy. This is covered in some detail on this page. Ingeniously Problematic™ may be used when defending yourself on some sort of charge - whether it be in court or your mother has accused you of something and you do not want to admit to it.
Ingeniously Problematic™ behaviour is not lying, but it is close to the line. The Ingeniously Problematic™ folk tend to be in the High D quadrant, but not always. Sometimes you have to look as to who gave instructions to whom.
Nevertheless, it can sometimes be a good tactic to use this technique when trying to extricate yourself from a problem.

Here is an example from a Master: "I did not have sexual relations with that woman, Miss Lewinsky." This famous statement from the former US President, Bill Clinton, is the Gold Standard of Ingeniously Problematic™ behaviour. If there was a Hall of Fame, he would be the Patron. This fits the definition and also fits the Hypocrisy Gauge of a Counselor. In 1999, Hillary Clinton described her husband as "a hard dog to keep on the porch".

Here is another general one: "I solemnly swear to tell the truth as I know it, the whole truth as I believe it to be and nothing but what I think you need to know."

Some patterns have a tendency to behave in a way which feels abrasive to others. This can either be because they have over the top and in your face personalities or because they can be a bit harsh in their delivery.

Here is the the Hypocrisy Gauge™ for each pattern also. The anger that is within and what sets off anger! Hypocrisy is very important in being Ingeniously Problematic™, or on its own, however hypocrisy is usually when the individual showing their toxic side. Hypocrisy is “the act of pretending to have beliefs, feelings, standards, qualities, opinions, behaviors, virtues, motivations, or other characteristics that one does not actually have." Merriam-Webster dictionary.

Conducted and composed by Modern Maven Elizabeth Hunter™ - Last Update November 4, 2022

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1. Can it be the Director - ESTJ?

The Director is the Border Collie

Hi Level Base Two-Faced Bitch Basis™: Loves to argue on the one hand.
Does not want anything to change on the other hand. Shares these hands (faces) with the Objective Thinker.

Hypocrisy Gauge™: Blasted Ingeniously Problematic™ assertion. “I get more ess, aitch, one, tee done than anybody else.” Actually intimidates Specialists and Practitioners to do the majority of their grunt work. (Same as the Developer).
They can have moments of hypocrisy when it comes to their own personal lives. They admire their resolve and firmness, but when others are being firm they may think they are just being ridiculously stubborn or pigheaded. They may pride themselves on not being emotional but blow a fuse when life feels chaotic or disorganized.

Statement that is most likely to be a lie: "I can handle it". Why? They are exaggerating to make the other person feel guilty.

When annoyed or angry: Will bluntly state whatever is making them upset.

Fuse length and what sets off anger: Very long fuse, but explosive anger if someone continuously disrespects them or their actions negatively impact them. Their straightforward nature can be misconstrued as anger. Their language is noticeably direct, straightforward and frank. They hate little details being out of place, carelessness, resistance to 'their way'.

Shows rage by: Giving a cruel and soulless gaze.

Abrasive and Rude™: YES. Sometimes (often) have abrasive personalities, since they are naturally aggressive people. They go after what they want and do not like allowing anything to stand in their way. They also value efficiency and so when someone is being lazy or incapable of getting something done they are unlikely to just let this slide. They will express their thoughts very clearly and they are not afraid of hurting someone’s feelings. While they care about their loved ones, for them, honesty is more important than sensitivity.

Covert Factor™ & E. Hunter™ comment: Has a fun side and can be very adventurous outside their normal duties. This is not always readily apparent. Can be difficult to manage, is also a rude and very picky customer.

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2. Can it be the Developer - ENTJ?

The Developer is the German Shepherd

Hi Level Base Two-Faced Bitch Basis™: Aspires to be idolized and followed on the one hand.
Hates narcissism and attention seeking on the other hand. Shares these hands (faces) with the Persuader.

Hypocrisy Gauge™: Blasted Ingeniously Problematic™ assertion. “I get more ess, aitch, one, tee done than anybody else.” Actually intimidates Specialists and Practitioners to do the majority of their grunt work. (Same as the Director).
They take on a mindset of not needing anyone, not needing to express their emotions or not needing “validation.” But, deep down, many are influenced by deeper sensitive feelings, especially during times of stress. They may lash out at people because they feel unseen for who they truly are or they feel dehumanized for all the tasks they take on. However, instead of acknowledging their emotional pain, they may lash out “You are being lazy” or “You are not doing good enough” rather than “I do not feel appreciated” or “I feel like people expect me to be a fcukong machine.”

Statement that is most likely to be a lie: "I’m not stressed, there’s not much pressure". Why? A political scandal of some sort is on their hands.

When annoyed or angry: Will come out with a cold, calculated, concise statement of icy fury.

Fuse length and what sets off anger: Very long fuse. More likely to appear confrontational or direct than angry. Calls out behaviour seen as unjust, incompetent, undermining and inefficient. Lashing out irrationally is not their typical way of dealing with stress unless they have anger issues that have developed over time. Least likely to suppress anger and least likely to show anger. Can 'go off' but only when totally necessary.

Shows rage by: Planning revenge; demolishing the other person's career etc.

Abrasive and Rude™: YES. Can be very abrasive people sometimes, simply because they are honest and upfront people. When they are expressing a point it can sometimes come across abrasive, since they are not great at toning things down to be sensitive to others. They express the facts without really trying to hold back for the sake of someone else and this can be a bit abrasive. They are also aggressive people, especially when they are going after what they want in life. This aggressive behaviour can be a bit abrasive at times, especially for people who are more sensitive.

Covert Factor™ & E. Hunter™ comment: Fiercely loyal, should you gain their loyalty, in a territorial manner in a style similar to that of a domesticated hell hound. This is the bully that your side wants and often needs.

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3. Can it be the Results - ESTP?

The Results is the Jack Russell Terrier

Hi Level Base Two-Faced Bitch Basis™: Loves the idea of settling down to a simple life on the one hand.
Drawn to adventure and dangerous situations on the other hand. Shares these hands (faces) with the Inspirational.

Hypocrisy Gauge™: Blasted Ingeniously Problematic™. Can dish it out but cannot take it well coming back the other way.
When stressed they can suddenly start coming out with generalizations that are far from accurate. They may suddenly make blanket complaints such as “No one around here pays any attention” or “Why do I always have to be the one to do every fcuking thing?” even when others have been contributing massively and helping out.
They also tend to pride themselves on their competence and pragmatic point of view. They may despise people who make careless or ill-timed decisions. But they also have a tendency towards impulsivity and, especially at toxic levels, tend to make careless decisions without thinking through the consequences.

Statement that is most likely to be a lie: "I could never betray you". Why? "Come on, it will be fun".

When annoyed or angry: Starts fighting, does a work out.

Fuse length and what sets off anger: Long fuse. Usually able to keep their anger in check unless they are surrounded by people who are impractical, boring, fanciful, confining them or wasting their time. When stressed, angry or overwhelmed are more likely to do something recreational to get their aggression out or distract themselves with something competitive and immersive.

Shows rage by: Physically attacking, sometimes.

Abrasive and Rude™: YES. Can sometimes be a bit abrasive when they are passionate about something. When they become truly excited or worked up, there are times when their personality can feel a little bit abrasive. They express themselves openly and go after the things which inspire them most in life. They are outgoing people who enjoy really being able to feel comfortable being themselves, which can sometimes cause them to appear abrasive to people who are not prepared for it.

Covert Factor™ & E. Hunter™ comment: Somewhat surprisingly, is quite aware and sensitive to the emotions of others and looks to maintain a certain self image. This is not at all easy to observe.

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4. Can it be the Inspirational - ENTP?

The Inspirational is the Bull Terrier

Hi Level Base Two-Faced Bitch Basis™: Loves the idea of settling down to a simple life on the one hand.
Drawn to adventure and dangerous situations on the other hand. Shares these hands (faces) with the Inspirational.

Hypocrisy Gauge™: Grand Master of Ingeniously Problematic statements. Takes logical shortcuts to jump to conclusions without checking the facts.
In their desire to be logical, they bypass the whole general point someone is making by getting stuck on a technicality. By being so particular about a certain technicality being defined or explained correctly they end up being irrational and missing a logical point that someone is trying to make.
As a Perceiver (P), they also thrive when they can work to their own timetable. They do not like being told how to structure their time or how to complete a task. But they may find themselves accusing another person of being “lazy” when that person does not follow through on a task in an orderly fashion. If someone else’s timeline is getting in the way of their freedom, then they can be quick to get annoyed or judge.
The more toxic = the more hypocritical they can be.

Statement that is most likely to be a lie: "I am self-confident". Why? They probably broke something.

When annoyed or angry: Will hurl calculated and witty insults at the other person.

Fuse length and what sets off anger: Long fuse. Less likely to blow up. Gets annoyed very easily and tends to show this especially when tired. Dislikes closed-minded/illogical thoughts and ignorance.

Shows rage by: Attacking the other person's insecurities.

Abrasive and Rude™: YES. Are sometimes abrasive people, since they do not like holding back or pandering to spare someone’s feelings. They do not want to hurt people, but they would rather be precise and accurate with their words. Consistently seek out debates as well and this type of behaviour can feel abrasive for those who do not like drama or confrontation. They would rather be able to argue about things so they can learn more about the details and uncover little truths they did not quite know before.

Covert Factor™ & E. Hunter™ comment: Consciously or subconsciously desires to engage and connect with others around them. This is central to their cunning modus operandi.

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5. Can it be the Persuader - ENFJ?

The Persuader is the Boxer

Hi Level Base Two-Faced Bitch Basis™: Aspires to be idolized and followed on the one hand.
Hates narcissism and attention seeking on the other hand. Shares these hands (faces) with the Developer.

Hypocrisy Gauge™: Watch out for Ingeniously Problematic™. Almost always running a secret agenda. (Same as the Appraiser).
This pattern often preachs to live up to one’s own potential; to change the world; to make a difference. They want people to grow and heal and be the best versions of themselves that they can be.
But when it comes to taking care of themselves, they are not as good at walking the walk.
They may give great advice (or poor advice) but have trouble following it themselves. They may urge others to take care of themselves, ask for help or set boundaries but find it difficult to do those things themselves. They’re famous for swooping in with insights and direction when others need help but failing to ask for help when they personally need it. Because of this, they often wear themselves down to the point of exhaustion in their efforts to help others reach their potential or feel good emotionally.
Some think of themselves as friendly, warm and generous in every action they take. They would imply that they do not have a selfish or mean bone in their body. But deep down, they can often be very critical of others, especially if they’re at an emotionally immature state. They can overanalyze ideas or actions of others and find fault, inconsistencies or reasons to be offended. The most toxic can be cliquey and judgmental, finding fault with anyone who does not align with their values. However, they may not confront someone directly to their face because they do not want to experience conflict or disharmony; this, of course, is blatant hypocrisy.

When annoyed or angry: Will explode with rage, either criticising those around them harshly or reacting physically - more likely to punch a wall than another person.

Statement that is most likely to be a lie: "I’m calm, I’m not angry". Why? They are protecting someone.

Fuse length and what sets off anger: Long fuse. Will talk over with a good friend first. Hates being taken advantage of, not appreciated, injustice or doing mundane and administrative tasks.

Shows rage by: Sarcastically stinging.

Abrasive and Rude™: YES. Are empathetic people so they can often tone things down when they are actually being abrasive. They do sometimes have over the top personalities though, especially when they are passionate about something. When they are excited about a subject sometimes they can go on chatting about it and this can seem a bit abrasive to some people. To those who are less outgoing and chatty, they might appear quite abrasive at times. Most of the time though, they like to make others feel comfortable and so they will tone it down.

Covert Factor™ & E. Hunter™ comment: Often has more to give and contribute, but this is masked by the reduction of pushing of their own ideas in order to accommodate others. This is the known tendency to interfere in other people's lives. Can be hoity-toity.

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6. Can it be the Appraiser - ESFJ?

The Appraiser is the Great Dane

Hi Level Base Two-Faced Bitch Basis™: Does not like other people being told what to do on the one hand.
Loves being told what to do on the other hand. Shares these hands (faces) with the Practitioner.

Hypocrisy Gauge™: Watch out for Ingeniously Problematic™. Almost always running a secret agenda. (Same as the Persuader).
Have a hypocritical side when it comes to their own emotional needs. They may be the first to comfort and support others, but have a hard time admitting when they need comfort or support themselves. Often taking on too much, they may avoid asking for help even when they are overwhelmed because they do not want to burden others. They may frequently tell others to ask them for help and to not feel ashamed if they need help but then keep their own problems to themselves because they feel ashamed.
Some also present themselves as being friendly and open-minded only to gossip about others behind their backs or create an “us vs them” scenario. This is typically a quality demonstrated by the most toxic of this pattern.

Statement that is most likely to be a lie: "I wasn’t jealous". Why? They are just trying to make the story more relatable for the other person.

When annoyed or angry: Will be blunt or overly critical. Will hold grudges.

Fuse length and what sets off anger: Long fuse. Talks to the trusted someone first. Will express feelings readily, then move on. Many times their anger comes across as firmness and tight-lipped resolve rather than fury or temper tantrums. Apart from when emotionally invested in someone and that person hurts them they can become uncharacteristically aggressive or critical. Hates not being appreciated, or someone upsetting their deeply held values.

Shows rage by: Becoming hysterical.

Abrasive and Rude™: YES but NOT USUALLY. Tries not to be abrasive, since they want to be sensitive and respective of others. They can often tell when they are upsetting someone and so they will try to tone things down or take a step back when this happens. Their ability to connect with others and understand their needs, does often help them avoid being too abrasive. The only times where they might appear more abrasive, is when they are trying to help someone and that person really does not want the help.

Covert Factor™ & E. Hunter™ comment: Struggles to identify their own needs and desires due to the tendency to satisfy others first. This is pretty right.


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7. Can it be the Promoter - ENFP?

The Promoter is the Golden Retriever

Hi Level Base Two-Faced Bitch Basis™: Makes everyone laugh as the class clown on the one hand.
Hates when people do not take them seriously on the other hand. Shares these hands (faces) with the Counselor.

Hypocrisy Gauge™: Watch out for Ingeniously Problematic™. Constantly encouraging others to stretch, when they themselves have areas they stubbornly refuse to change.
They pride themselves on being accepting and empathetic. At times they can love the idea of someone more than they love the actual person. They can get so caught up in the potential of someone that they forget about the real person right in front of them. They may have such high standards for how things “could be” that they end up disappointed or judgmental when reality does not match up. They may disparage others for not being accepting, while they love idealized version of someone instead of that person’s true self.
As a Perceiver (P), they can also run into the issue of working on their own timeline, but wanting others to hurry things up. They are hopeless on time and are the classic 'last minute merchant'. In their minds, when they do not follow through on something they are busy – but when another person procrastinates, they are branded lazy or when another person holds them to account they are accused of making things difficult. This is more for the toxic ones of this pattern. And this can be the 200% toxic.

Statement that is most likely to be a lie: "I’m okay". Why? It is called being creative.

When annoyed or angry: Will drop the relationship (self vaporize) or blow up and may or may not later appropriately apologize to the person or to the others who observed the tirade.

Fuse length and what sets off anger: Mixed bag. Wants to maintain harmony. Hates criticism, being controlled or held to account.

Shows rage by: Striking with scattered arguments.

Abrasive and Rude™: YES. Are outgoing people and sometimes this can feel a bit abrasive. Most of the time they do not like to be too overboard with their behaviour, but they express themselves openly. When they are feeling passionate and excited about something, they can be a little bit abrasive. They go after what they want and sometimes this can be hard for others to handle when they simply will stop at nothing to acquire these goals. They also can be occasionally needy when they want something from a specific person, and this can feel abrasive.

Covert Factor™ & E. Hunter™ comment: Covets access to leadership in order to be a driving force for their causes. This is the pipe dreamer. Never finishes anything which is what any competent leader must do. Pops up when they need you and vapourises when they do not.

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8. Can it be the Counselor - ESFP

The Counselor is the Poodle

Hi Level Base Two-Faced Bitch Basis™: Makes everyone laugh as the class clown on the one hand.
Hates when people do not take them seriously on the other hand. Shares these hands (faces) with the Promoter.

Hypocrisy Gauge™: Watch out for Ingeniously Problematic™. Pretty much on the level. (Same as the Specialist).
When toxic, they can fall prey to certain “unrealistic” tendencies. For example, they may find themselves idealizing people or situations that are clearly not as perfect as they seem. Or they may take reckless risks that inevitably backfire just because they feel like taking a chance or getting a rush. At an extreme, they can fall prey to issues such as like gambling – hoping that their luck will win out and losing sight of the fact that, realistically, the odds are against them.

Statement that is most likely to be a lie: "I promise, I’ll be careful". Why? The whole story is a lie and they are probably drunk.

When annoyed or angry: Will cry, yell or throw a fit, although will get over it quickly.

Fuse length and what sets off anger: Short fuse. Hesitates if in fun environment. Feels better pretty quickly after being able to blow off some steam. Very quick to forgive and move on. Hates being controlled/having freedom to have fun taken away or tanking criticism.

Shows rage by: Yelling and crying.

Abrasive and Rude™: YES. Sometimes have over the top personalities, which can be a bit abrasive for some. They express themselves openly, without allowing anything to hold them back. When they want something they will stop at nothing to get it and so this can feel a little bit abrasive for others. They do not mind being a little wild when they want something and simply want to go after what inspires them most. This can certainly makes them abrasive to some people who cannot handle their intensity.

Covert Factor™ & E. Hunter™ comment: Deep thinker and emotionally intense. This makes them somewhat difficult to deal with.

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9. Can it be the Specialist - ISFP

The Specialist is the Saint Bernard

Hi Level Base Two-Faced Bitch Basis™: Loves the idea of adventure and dangerous situations on the one hand.
Ends up settling down to a simple life on the other hand. Shares these hands (faces) with the Achiever.

Hypocrisy Gauge™: Rare Ingeniously Problematic™. Pretty much on the level. (Same as the Counselor).
Can have issues with being blind to certain areas and inconsistencies in themselves. They may consider themselves tolerant and open-minded, yet judge people who have opinions that are different from their own.
As Sensors (S), they may talk about being realistic while simultaneously accepting their feelings about something as “fact”. Both are hypocrisy.
When toxic, tend to judge others harshly even though they do not reach out to interact with people or expose themselves to social situations that might offer more insight into humans as a whole.
They retreat more, become more stubbornly attached to their feelings and can see the world outside in a judgmental way without actually experiencing it firsthand.

Statement that is most likely to be a lie: "I've got it under control". Why? To appear to give a better impression.

When annoyed or angry: Will use body language, becoming distant, pouting or by the use of other nonverbal cues.

Fuse length and what sets off anger: The paradox. Most likely to get upset or angry and show it, as well as the type most likely to get upset or angry and not show it. Internalises anger. Hates other people stepping on emotions, limitations of freedom.

Shows rage by: Disappearing for a while.

Abrasive and Rude™: NO. Are not often abrasive people, since they keep to themselves most of the time. They do not like being too over the top around people who they do not understand or trust. When they do trust someone they might be a little bit more open to be themselves and even be a bit over the top. They are not usually abrasive though, since they are sensitive people who understand when someone needs their space and they will not invade this in an obnoxious way.

Covert Factor™ & E. Hunter™ comment: Wants to bring about change in a way that they lead and inspire the charge rather than forcing against other people's will by influencing them to create change in the same direction through other's different contributions. This makes them poor managers as cannot actually handle change especially on short notice.

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10. Can it be the Investigator - INFJ?

The Investigator is the Greyhound

Hi Level Base Two-Faced Bitch Basis™: Has an innate desire to be original and mysterious on the one hand.
Becomes emotionally distraught on the other hand. Shares these hands (faces) with the Agent.

Hypocrisy Gauge™: Rare Ingeniously Problematic™. Whinges about the difficulties of extreme empathy. In reality, a bit smug while spending perhaps 10% of their time actually engaging people.
Has a personal inner world that they rarely share with others – even close friends or family members. Because of this, some may unintentionally withhold information from others in order to protect themselves or not be a “burden”. Some are so fixated on solving other peoples’ problems that they are blind to their own issues that need resolving.
When toxic, the more likely they are to have this issue. They hold back, believe that no one would understand and do not want to risk vulnerability.
Another area of hypocrisy that can often run into is with responding self-righteously to others while claiming to be open-minded and accepting. An example of this is when complaining about their partner being selfish and unsupportive, but never communicates their needs directly. They may fall prey to giving and then resenting or expecting people to “mind read” what they need, only to get upset when it does not happen.

Statement that is most likely to be a lie: "I don’t judge you". Why? They are trying to spare the other person's feelings.

When annoyed or angry: Will bring up each and every one of your flaws, weaknesses and vulnerabilities and use them to systematically and psychologically bring you down. Often repeats this tactless nagging and belittling in future outbursts.

Fuse length and what sets off anger: Long fuse. Represses anger until they have time to sort things out privately. If after time and reflection they felt that they had truly been wronged they are likely say something about it, but often with a sense of trepidation. Hard to get angry but when you hurt them emotionally or insulting a deeply held belief, be prepared.

Shows rage by: Door slamming the other person.

Abrasive and Rude™: NO. Do not usually have abrasive personalities, since they keep to themselves a lot with things. They are not likely to express themselves openly and so they do not often behave in a way that feels too abrasive. They are also very aware of others and their needs and can tell when someone finds their behaviour to be too much. In these situations, they know when the tone it back and be a bit less abrasive. Naturally they do not have personalities which are too abrasive or hard to handle, since they are good at reading others and responding to them.

Covert Factor™ & E. Hunter™ comment: Can struggle to gain emotional satisfaction from relationships. Their need for emotional connection with others may be larger than what others want to contribute. Can go from Dr. Jekyll to Mr. Hyde.

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11. Can it be the Agent - INFP?

The Agent is the Tibetan Terrier

Hi Level Base Two-Faced Bitch Basis™: Has an innate desire to be original and mysterious on the one hand.
Becomes emotionally distraught on the other hand. Shares these hands (faces) with the Agent.

Hypocrisy Gauge™: Rare Ingeniously Problematic™. Extremely tolerant...until they are not anymore. Then, they will violate every value they have to make their point.
When toxic they may call themselves open-minded and accepting, but vilify people who disagree with them on a core value. Often good listeners, they typically have a warm and empathetic presence. But if someone disagrees with them, perhaps politically, that same person can suddenly become self-righteous and judgmental instead of putting themselves into the other person’s perspective and seeing their point.
They may blatantly cut off people who disagree with them on core values, especially, ironically, the core values of tolerance.

Statement that is most likely to be a lie: "I’m over it". Why? They have forgotten how the story actually goes.

When annoyed or angry: Will keep feelings to themselves, showing only small signs of passive-aggressiveness. Will blow up once in a while.

Fuse length and what sets off anger: Long fuse. Suppresses anger. Violation of something really important would have to occur for for them to lash out at you in most cases. That said, they can become especially sarcastic and cynical when they are extremely stressed. A once a year event. Hates injustice and hypocrisy.

Shows rage by: Gives the silent treatment.

Abrasive and Rude™: NO. Capable of keeping things to themselves and are often sensitive people. They do not like being abrasive or behaving in a way which upsets others. They are not usually abrasive people since they prefer to give others their space and distance. They do not enjoy when people get in their face and do not give them room to breathe and so they are not often like this towards others. They do have times when they want the attention of someone they love and this can feel a bit needy but not necessarily abrasive.

Covert Factor™ & E. Hunter™ comment: Has a love hate relationship with leadership as they want to be an inspiration to others to propel their causes forward but not hurt or harm those in the way because of their decisions. Therefore never appoint them as a leader, ever.

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12. Can it be the Achiever - ISTP?

The Achiever is the Bassett Hound

Hi Level Base Two-Faced Bitch Basis™: Loves the idea of adventure and dangerous situations on the one hand.
Ends up settling down to a simple life on the other hand. Shares these hands (faces) with the Specialist.

Hypocrisy Gauge™: Rare Ingeniously Problematic™. Scoffs at everyone else’s superstitious biases while blind to their own.
When toxic overly reductive logic does not take into account the complexities and nuances of life. As an example, “if you don’t like it here then just leave” in response to someone’s valid complaints about a situation.
When stressed may accuse others of being lazy when they do not follow through on a task. Yet they will excuse themselves for not finishing something because they were “too busy.”

Statement that is most likely to be a lie: "It's no big deal". Why? They are being sarcastic but in such a deadpan tone that the other person did not notice.

When annoyed or angry: Will curse and be insulting the other person, or express their emotions physically - by fighting or punching something.

Fuse length and what sets off anger: Long fuse but massive temper. Generally self controlled. Hates people trying to annoy/upset them, hates a lack of time alone.

Shows rage by: Logically rips the other person apart.

Abrasive and Rude™: NO. Do not usually have abrasive personalities, since they are much more relaxed most of the time. They do not like being over the top or pushing other people as they prefer to do things on their own most of the time. They understand how to respect others when they want space, since this is important for them as well. They are often seen as the chilled and laid back people, instead of the abrasive types.

Covert Factor™ & E. Hunter™ comment: Wants recognition and to gain a good reputation to prove their competency and capacity. The true Mr. Fixit. Has a terrible temper though.


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13. Can it be the Practitioner - ISFJ?

The Practitioner is the Alaskan Malamute

Hi Level Base Two-Faced Bitch Basis™: Does not like other people being told what to do on the one hand.
Loves being told what to do on the other hand. Shares these hands (faces) with the Appraiser.

Hypocrisy Gauge™: Not Ingeniously Problematic™. Expecting others to be reliable/predictable while excusing their own occasional decision that was not expected.
Can can be hypocritical when they start to value their own experience and personal beliefs over logic. They may think that they are being practical when they restrict their worldview to their personal narrative. In fact they are being closed-minded, rusted on to the past and impractical. During stress, they can be especially prone to buying into conspiracy theories or worst-case scenario projections.
They may also claim to care about people and their feelings but only if those people think and feel the same way they do. If someone has a different opinion, or makes a decision about something with which they do not agree, they may see them as ignorant or foolish and write them off entirely by ignoring which, of course is being passive-aggressive.

Statement that is most likely to be a lie: "I don’t need help". Why? Will twist the story slightly so it does not sound like they are making everything be about themselves.

When annoyed or angry: Will bottle up their frustration. Will engage in light hearted, but frustrated, comments that get the point across without burning bridges.

Fuse length and what sets off anger: Long fuse. Suppresses anger which is in line with avoiding conflict. Lets out anger slowly using passive-aggressiveness. Hates not being acknowledged, hates someone they are close to being hurt in some way.

Shows rage by: Bottling up anger, then finally explodes.

Abrasive and Rude™: NO. Are not usually abrasive people, since they care about being respectful of others. They care about how others feel and want to make them happy and comfortable. For them it is important to take a step back and really think about how their actions will affect those around them. They try hard to be sensitive and do not want to be seen as over the top people. They just are not naturally abrasive and can actually be a bit more reserved than anything else.

Covert Factor™ & E. Hunter™ comment: Very quirky and ofter holds interesting points of view or artistic flair which are generally not on display for others to see. The trouble starts when tasks or views are in play in a conflict scenario making them un-selectable as managers or leaders and when they become passive-aggressive.

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14. Can it be the Objective Thinker - ISTJ?

The Objective Thinker is the Bernese Mountain Dog

Hi Level Base Two-Faced Bitch Basis™: Loves to argue on the one hand.
Does not want anything to change on the other hand. Shares these hands (faces) with the Director.

Hypocrisy Gauge™: Not Ingeniously Problematic™. What you see is what you get, pretty much.
When other people take a long time to do something, they may find themselves thinking that the other person is being too slow or compulsive. This is especially true when they are being pressured or rushed – they may be more likely to see someone else’s need for caution and meticulousness as incompetence or procrastination.
When toxic, they may claim to value logic and pragmatism, but find themselves avoiding new or unusual scenarios or ideas because they feel uncomfortable with the unknown or they have an uneasy “feeling.” During stress especially, they may find themselves catastrophizing or obsessing over conspiracy theories.

Statement that is most likely to be a lie: "Oh sorry, I forgot". Why? They are not lying. What are you on?

When annoyed or angry: Will make snarky comments and show their anger passively or may approach the person directly and pragmatically.

Fuse length and what sets off anger: Long fuse. Prefers to keep offenses private, dealing with them one-on-one instead of publicly. They may seem very direct and confrontational when trying to solve a problem, but their intent is rarely to stir up conflict. Difficult to get upset and even more difficult to show it. Hates stress, disrespecting hierarchy.

Shows rage by: Showing verbal vengeance.

Abrasive and Rude™: NO. Are not often abrasive people, since they like to keep to themselves and respect the boundaries of others. For them, it is important to be courteous to others and what they need for space and distance. They will not be in someone’s face when they need to be on their own, since they understand this desire. They do sometimes have a tendency to appear abrasive when they are being direct or trying to get something done, since they are not good at being sensitive to someone else’s emotions in this situation.

Covert Factor™ & E. Hunter™ comment: Are humourous and playful in a child-like manner when they are not working on a task. Are totally fabulous when working on a task. The consummate project manager.

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15. Can it be the Perfectionist - INTP?

The Perfectionist is the Papillon

Hi Level Base Two-Faced Bitch Basis™: Wants to be loved and emotionally connected on the one hand.
Despises irrational human emotions on the other hand. Shares these hands (faces) with the Enhancer.

Hypocrisy Gauge™: Not Ingeniously Problematic™. Cannot handle other people’s emotions because they are secretly preoccupied with finding their own.
When toxic, may accuse someone else of not thinking things through when that person moves slowly on a project or task. If that person’s process is getting in the way of their process, then they are being “inconsiderate” or “inefficient”. It is especially true if they are at risk of being vulnerable. Many excuse themselves when they are running late or make a social faux pas only to get frustrated and stressed when someone in their family or at work does exctly the same thing.
The more toxic, the more that you will witness this type of hypocrisy.

Statement that is most likely to be a lie: "Whatever...". Why? It is a social experiment for them. They are analyzing your response. Do not trust them.

When annoyed or angry: Will use sharp insults to hurt the other person.

Fuse length and what sets off anger: Long fuse. Least likely to rely on religious beliefs and second-least likely to talk to someone close to them. Will try to control by rational control or retreating. Hates persistently being bugged about something, inefficiency or being told to get on with it.

Shows rage by: Logically rips the other person apart.

Abrasive and Rude™: NO. Are not often abrasive since they prefer to be on their own and avoid people. They limit their interactions since they can become drained by too much socializing. Thay also are not the type of people to be in someone’s face; instead they seem a bit more cool and collected in their behaviour. The only times they might appear abrasive is when they are being direct and expressing a fact to someone. They do not always deliver things in a sensitive nature and so this can seem a bit abrasive and unintentionally hurtful at times.

Covert Factor™ & E. Hunter™ comment: Values reputation and respect rather highly, especially as it relates to their work. The totally impractical absent-minded professor.

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16. Can it be the Enhancer - INTJ?

The Enhancer is a Lone Wolf

Hi Level Base Two-Faced Bitch Basis™: Wants to be loved and emotionally connected on the one hand.
Despises irrational human emotions on the other hand. Shares these hands (faces) with the Perfectionist.

Hypocrisy Gauge™: Not Ingeniously Problematic™. Projects aura of extreme depth and decisiveness. Secretly an obsessive and enthusiastic fan of someone or something.
This pattern can be extremely stubborn. When they have a clear vision of the future, or sense a pattern and how it will unfold, they hold to it tightly. They are the masters of picking patterns and inconsistencies.
They may believe that when they state their side strongly they are being firm. But if you state your side strongly, you might be seen as pigheaded or or unmanageable. When you do something unexpected and unpredictable, you are being inconsiderate and annoying.
But when they do something unexpected, they consider theat to be original or even creative. When at their best they are masters at perspective-shifting and can easily spot and understand others’ points of view. They also tap into their convictions and consider whether what they are doing actually lines up with their personal values. When toxic, they may not realize how much their feeling-values impact their judgment. Sometimes they think that they are being rational and detached, when actually they are deeply affected by an individual idea of something’s “rightness” or “wrongness.” They may say “I’m not being emotional!” or “I’m not angry” when they are obviously fuming at someone’s opinion. This can be especially evident if the other person is not being factual or has already been classified as a complete idiot.

Statement that is most likely to be a lie: "I don’t care". Why? They do not want to waste their breath on a detailed explanation, especially if you are an idiot.

When annoyed or angry: Long fuse. Will tell you all about how so and so is being extremely stupid. Will tend to either hide these sentiments, express them through passive aggressiveness or only tell those closest to them. When really mad, will either explode with rage or channel their anger into an icy cold fury.

Fuse length and what sets off anger: Finds it easy to get annoyed. Inefficiency, others flaking on plans.

Shows rage by: Giving the death stare; Door slamming; Planning revenge; Ignoring them.

Abrasive and Rude™: NO. Are not abrasive in the sense that they are in others faces, since they do believe in giving people space. While they may not go overboard in this way, they can sometimes be abrasive in their own way. They can sometimes be harsh and do not always deliver things in a sensitive manner. They are not great at toning things down in order to be sensitive to the emotional needs of others and this can be both abrasive and challenging for those around them sometimes.

Covert Factor™ & E. Hunter™ comment: Teddy bears underneath their granite exterior. Engages in a self-fulfilling prophesy that they have to protect themselves from others weakening their true selves resulting in a soft interior that is even more emotionally vulnerable than others. However, they can be spiteful and more than willing to see the offender’s world 'burn' to get even. The best revenge against their enemies is to be more successful than them so they can rub it in their face if the other party happens to be still around. For the other person, they will not help them if they get into trouble. If the other person made their bed, they can lie in it. If an offender happens to end up in difficult or horrible circumstances, or worse, the Enhancer will consider it poetic justice. Can be vengeful, especially when they are younger. However, they will not go after someone for no reason and will only do this when they feel someone needs to be put in their place. And that may involve having the other person vapourise or just blocking them or executing the door slam. Paradoxically, they will not be enticed into door slamming. Example: The Enhancer makes worthwhile suggestions on a project and these are totally ignored. When the thing bombs, the Enhancer reaches for the Dom Pérignon. It gives them unrivalled satisfaction! Annoyingly, they are usually correct which upsets some viewers; enhancing the Dom. Elizabeth Hunter™ is an Enhancer. Only one or two people would have known all this prior to her composing oxor.com.au.

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Dealing with Rude People

The Rude Bastard

† 1. Do not lose your cool. Get hold and control of your anger first.
† 2. Do not take it personally. It may not have anything to do with you.
† 3. Confront. Do this only if the other person is out of line. Otherwise refrain.
† 4. Do not expect the other person's rude behaviour to change. That is just the way they are - e.g. the toxic Promoter or narcissist.
† 5. Objectify the situation. Evaluate the issue from different perspectives.
† 6. Use a selective response system. Acknowledge positive responses and ignore the rude comments. This can be difficult when dealing with an R. Sole.
† 7. Try to understand why the person is rude. Why do they act that way? Are they perpetually miserable?
† 8. Address the reasons why the person is rude.
† 9. Ask the rude person how you can help. This may help them release pent up emotion. This can be a difficult step if you cannot waer the person under any circumstances.
† 10. Elevate aor exercise your authority with the rude person. Do not let the person walk all over you. Pull rank.
† 11. Maintain your dignity. The action of the rude person must not make you feel lesser about yourself.
† 12. Raise your consciousness to a level such that you cannot be affected.
† 13. Connect with other people who may be able to assist you.
† 14. Opt out of the interaction. You may not have to be involved. Avoid the rude person if at all possible. e.g. Do not walk past the toxic Promoter's residence or walk the route that the Passive-Aggressive Practitioner (and neighbour) always takes.
† 15. Self-reflect about times when you were rude to others.

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